2 more months

Two more months to meet baby Edgar. We decided this name because Tong likes it. He said that this name is not so common and it sounded fierce. According to my dear hubby, a famous MMA fighter and a footballer also share the same name. I hope he will make a name for himself someday.

The first three months of pregnancy was an unpleasant experience. I couldn’t work as per normal and had to give up my show flat duties. I couldn’t eat properly and feeling nausea every single day. I am also super sensitive to smell and the sight of food & Toto turns me down. Poor Toto, I must had neglected him back then. I’ve lost 4 kilos in my first trimester. The only thing i feel good is to sleep, so i became like a sick patient sleeping all day long. However, i still try to go for viewing despite not feeling well and i almost fainted.  I am glad that Irene and Tong is very supportive during this tough time. Not to mention my dearest mum, she will cook me porridge as breakfast everyday and send to my door-step. I am fortunate to have her doting me and baby Edgar as well as her son in law. She wanted Tong to concentrate on his work and not to worry about my meals.

Second trimester of my pregnancy was an enjoyable one. No more vomit, no more nausea and my appetite is back to normal. I am able to play with Toto again. I could feel baby Edgar’s movement at about 20weeks. That was amazing, feeling a life in my tummy. I wish to share this joy to Tong, but the little kicks and movement was not strong enough to be felt outside the tummy. As time goes by, the kick gradually gets stronger that i could even see it with my own eyes. The funny part was, i remember having an impression from TV or movies that the Daddy put his ear on the wife’s tummy to listen to baby’s heartbeat. I asked Tong to do the same thing and what i got from him was my stomach digestion sound.

I just entered the third trimester of my pregnancy. Looking forward to my next appointment with Dr Ooi. Looking forward to see how is baby Edgar’s progression.

Beautiful October – Tokyo Japan

It is very interesting to look back to those memories I had blogged. I saw who i used to be and realized that i had grown to become a very different individual. I don’t even remember myself behaving like that in the past.

Anyway,

this is a wonderful October! Everything seems to fall in place nicely. 🙂

I just came back from Tokyo – business trip and would like to pin down some memories here. I know that this trip is going to be a fruitful one. I am also very glad that I had chosen the right person to work with – Shann (when I was away). -A pat on the shoulder-

As we all know, Tokyo is a shopping & food paradise. I couldn’t control myself from eating. It is unlike Singapore where you can find all kinds of dishes such as Ramen, Tempura, Udon, Sushi in one Japanese restaurant. In Japan, every shop has their own specialty. As far as i had eaten, i had not tasted anything bad in the restaurant. This trip, i had Ramen & Sushi. I had also settled some meals at their 7-11 stores.

This ramen is Tonkotsu soup base. Within short walk from waseda station.

Randomly, had this bowl of ramen in Shinjuku area.

I find this spaghetti bread interesting.

Alright, I shall Blog more often.

2012 New Year New Resolution

While waiting for my dear friend, I shall kill the boredom by updating my blog. I really think a lot and enjoy thinking a lot when I got nothing to do.

Have you ever ask yourself what you really want in life?

My answer: Always!

1) loan free
2) financial freedom
3) able to provide for my family things that they never thought of buying for themselves
4) a nice sports car
5) perhaps own a few properties

To achieve this, it equates to a lot of hard-work, opportunity and luck. All these years, I’ve been trying hard to achieve but I always fail due to the lack of determination. Perhaps, is time to think harder. I’m always trying ways to seek for a better life, and grabbing opportunities. Maybe that’s why i ended up like a job hopper. Friends & family may think that I gave up too easily in achieving the things I previously set. For me, I think that I’m fine tuning the ways towards my goal.

Besides money, I also want to do things more meaningful. Actually, I’m quite happy as a property agent for being able to earn and at the same time helping family to have a shelter above their head. It is even more encouraging if I get positive feedback from my buyers and sellers. On top of that, they refer their friends and family back me to. Speechless- satisfaction.

I couldn’t find it here. (now)
Boss is very nice. Colleagues are superb. I can’t bring myself to let the boss to know my intention. On the other hand, I know this job is definitely not what I want in long term.

Anyway, I will bring my courage and talk about it soon.

Currently, I’ve got a career in mind. Decision is not concrete yet. If I start this, I make sure this is the final career path.

New year new resolution.
No.1 Building a career
No.2 work out more
No.3 more family time

3 goals for next year.. Weeeeeeeee….

I live with no regrets..

I so enjoy having my own place, despite doing more housework. Lumpy and I get to spend more time together too. But still, there is no best of both world. I miss my family.

Work wise is really tiring & enjoying. Must be thinking how can “tiring” & “enjoying” coincide. Anyway, I can’t find any satisfaction in my job and that makes work tiring. It also seems to have no breakthrough. Well,bosses are nice and the only thing i look forward to work are my colleagues. Actually, I no longer categorize them as colleagues but good friends cause they really brighten my days and i so love them.

So, what more can i ask? Me, as a normal human can never be satisfied. I just need more time to sleep, more freedom and do things more meaningful. Can that be acheived? I will keep seeking, keep trying till i get it right.

May updates

I joke with lumpy that my dad requested him to call him dad! I guess it is really difficult to open the darn bloody mouth to call someone else dad and mum. It is easy to address others as your sister la, brother la, good friend la, best friend la. But I really cant get away the awkward feeling to bring myself to address someone as my dad or mum. Is something really personal! Anyway, in no time (September) by hook or by crook I must accept this fact and tune my mindset.

I frequently get people asking me. “How’s your new job? ”

First of all, I must say I really feel blessed because people here are helpful and really nice to me. I must say I quite like the people here. Somehow or rather i like the working environment, such that it is fast paced and i enjoy feeling occupied with work stuff.

Come to think of it, I somehow miss my ERA colleagues and I hope they still remember me.

Empty Shell

Wolf in a sheep’s cloth; crocodile tears, are simply a few of the best description of a KIND of human. This kind of human usually potrays a good image, a good role, a good heart. But in actual fact, they are full of hidden agenda. A best word i could find to best describe them is “Cunning”. Once they know their trick wouldn’t work on someone or that someone is of no use, they turn their back and give that someone a hard time.

I have to admit that it requires alot of wisdom and intelligence to be a wolf. I have to salute him for that. He manipulates people, and make people listens to him. I have to salute him for this too.

However, I don’t buy his trick. I almost fall into his trap, somehow or rather, Im blessed and got out of it. I simply just do not want to be another puppet of his. Now that i had stepped out of the trap, I’ve see things much more clearer. At the very beginning, i felt that i’ve let him down. Gradually i felt that he is indirectly going against me. And now, I can conclude that he is really going against me.

Sometimes i wonder, why would someone so rich and successful wants to go against a small fly like me? Recently, i got an answer. Yes, he drives good car and being perceived as a successful person with financial freedom. Are the stuff charged by credit card or borrow $$$ from someone? I guess if it is made to public, he will have a BIG EGO BRUISED. What’s with having good things using other’s money? Do you feel great owning this stuff? Come’on stop acting you are well doing.. it makes me puke. I know now im simply of no use to him, he tries to hurt me again and again. Please! leave a “real sheep” like me alone. I never want to get involve with such person like you. I am not your match because i am not as cunning as you. =p

I will not get myself involved with him but is sad that some people around him are people that i dear. I just hope they will not get hurt, someday, or even when his tricks were exposed.

wear out

It is really a busy busy busy season for me. No joke concentrating studies and managing work at the same time. My school work is driving me crazy. Sleeping early in the morning 5/6am was terror. I do not want a life like an owl. Time just simply crawl like nobody’s business. I thought by stopping flying, it can help to cure my insomia but it seems that I really have sleeping disorder. Sleeping at weird, long and wee hours! So much so of complaining YET I still like doing stuff at night. Though i like crowds (in the day) but sometime i do enjoy being alone at night.

Having my own space, listen to myself.

Again! School work is driving me crazy!!! This month is Assignments, test and EXAM season! By the way, I was shock and happy to get quite a high mark for my law test. Hopefully, i can score well for my law assignment and soar for a distinction for this (dreaming again).

When it comes to work, or even social situation. Ive realised that it is not JUST about the money that gives me the satisfaction. I enjoy making people happy. This is the kind of satisfaction I want! And im enjoying it!

farmers

I am really very lazy. Trying my best to acheive my will power i used to have. I finally got my butt off and went farming ALONE! Used up 600 flyers today. I want to aim to give out 1000 flyers a day. Hopefully with hard work there is result.

Another presentation tomorrow! Hope my angels will be with me.

Chirping Bird

I’ve realised my blog is all about ranting and grumbling. That reflect so bad about myself. I only like to blog when i feel that no one understands me and somehow i have to speak it out to feel better.

I will try to write down more happy moments to remind myself that i am fortunate. I felt happy whenever I purposely drive pass my new house. Is 15 STOREY TALL now! At the same time i feel inferior of the amount of money to spend.

Yesterday, a small young bird flew into my house. My brother and his girlfriend wanted to keep it. DUE to hungry ghost festival, the superstitious DAD refused to let them keep. With no choice, they have to FREE THE BIRD. The poor little bird didn’t want to fly away. It stood nicely and slept on my brother’s middle finger. They went all the way to bishan park to set it free (Still on my brother’s finger).

Emo

Really feel fuck up with whats going on right now. Why must I have a life controlled by others. I just wish i shouldn’t care too much about others. BUT i can’t!

Appearing selfish is what others say about me.. if either decision is made. There is no way of compromising. Follow my heart is easy to be said than do. But my heart is in a huge confusion. So whose the selfish one right now?

I’m really too emotional and not a good decision maker.
At times, I hated myself.
I don’t want to be a puppet anymore.